the year.

three posts last year. I was busy. i must have canned so many vegetables i could feed a small neighborhood for a year. fruit too. i even tried my hand at some jam. i didnt to bad. the year has been no picnic though. in between times of working, and trying to live, i have run off animals that normally be in this area. a few wolves, a bear. my guess is that they escaped the zoo. the wolves, especially, since wolves are not native to a city in middle Tennessee. have i thought about moving? yes. but where would i go. this is a lot to move, and i find these days i am to weary to do much moving of heavy things. especially after the generator. about july, the power went down. there was a storm that blew through. mustve thought it was a hurricane the way the wind blew. lucky for me, not much damage was done to the buildings outside. the chicken coop, while i admit poorly built, still stands proud. the fencing is all still in place. i still have about 4 of my freezers full of frozen things. hell, i even got some stuff in there for pizza. which once a month i happily indulge in. i dont have cattle anymore, but i do have one milk cow. surprisingly enough, no animals have bothered with it. i imagine there is better game out there. pack of dogs that once were tame, are now wild, but never really come around here. ah, the generator. big enough to run pretty much the whole house. gas. i go for gas about once a week. haul it back on a tailor. took me a few days to figure it all out, but i finally got it.i run a few lights, the air conditioner this summer and some fans. its starting to cool off now, so i just run the fans. five, to be exact, in the windows. i leave the windows up alot. the nights are getting nice and cool. i stay pretty well stoned alot. i must had cut four or five pounds just this past year of my plants. i dont have any growing now. i have enough weed to last me through the winter! i use my grill instead of my stove. i put a lot of chicken in the deep freeze. I do have a nice griddle in the house though for a number of other things. electric, but doesnt use up much of the gas when i cook. i couldve gone green there too, but the solar powered gens are small, and dont have the capacity i need to run what i need. sometimes i dont use he lights. i have a bunch of lanterns, soley run off batteries. MUST LOVE batteries! as lonley as i am, batteries are my best friend. but, wont get into that. the cell towers still work! obviously. thats how i am able to get online. which i dont do to often these days. i have taken up painting as a hobby. canvas seems to bring out some side of me i didnt know before. i never really considered myself artistic, but i have to say that with a paintbrush in hand, what i feel just seems to glide onto the canvas. it speaks to me. i also play the sims alot. it gives me the sense i need that im not alone, but its only for a short while. sometimes i get so much into the game that i forget i AM alone. i only snap out of it when my shepherd isah lays his head on my leg as if to ask when i will come back to earth to feed him. i have to keep my female outside. there is just no way i can spay her. she doesnt mind. the fence is secure enough. most of the pups she has had, have ran away with other dogs. gardening, is my first job. i grow a small garden now, since i have so many things canned. mostly tomatoes. i have a really nice flower garden, and many many herbs growing. i have learned so much about herbs. i also do alot of crystal magick and earth magick. funny, when i was part of a population, i wasnt this a good a witch. i guess being thrown back to the days of my ancestors really allowed me to appreciate the earth in an entirely different way. i still work out every morning, and try to stay healthy. at night, i settle down with a glass of wine and a nice joint. watch a movie on the computer. go to bed. just to wake up and face the day all over again. im lonley. as always.